[life, interrupted]

Yesterday, the pressure of high school was still upon me as I readied for my speech and made sure I did not fall up/down the stairs during the processional.

Today has marked my first day as a graduate.

And what did I do on my first day? Well I came home around 2 am (this is what not having a curfew does to me) after watching "(500) Days of Summer" with fellow cohorts. I blame my friend because his clock was an hour behind. But whatever it was not a big deal. I woke up around 10-11 because I figured I had stuff to do.

I made myself three pieces of bacon which served as my breakfast and turned on the computer to find a scholarship I still needed to do. Work has a habit of catching up with me. My high school transcript was supposed to be postmarked last Friday, so stress ensued and I hurried to find the paperwork.

Then, as my first day as a graduate, I went back to school. I had to turn in another form for my transcript. Luckily, no one was really there to witness my shameful return because it was finals week (ha!) and they were already out. Dan and I went to Jewel to buy necessary equipment for the cemetery to visit Paw Paw.

Now, I always get pretty emotional because I take death pretty hard. I am a crier, which a lot of people probably would not believe because I have a snarky exterior, but it is true. And it got me thinking about life. One of my classmates' father passed away on graduation day. And it really sucks. I was never close with her, but we were always friendly and chatted once and a while. It could easily be my dad with a brain tumor. It is not something that is usually checked for, especially since my dad has not gone for a check-up in an extremely long time. I worry about it because it is something so simple that might make a huge difference. I always feel badly for my classmates whose parents or siblings pass away. I know that I take the death of a grandparent hard; I cannot imagine what it would be like for someone closer.

Soon after, my friends and I gathered to take the el downtown to see She & Him for free at Millennium Park. We got food and got to the venue just with the opening band was starting. And boy was it a zoo. There were thousands of people there. It was packed and overflowing and there was not even a clear boundary. We found a patch of grass far away where the sound could still reach. All I can say is good think my friend Jaclyn and I decided to fumble through the crowd to get closer. On the grassy knoll, I just felt uncomfortable. I was on the outside of conversations and it was just not enjoyable. But whatever, I removed myself from the situation. Jaclyn and I took pictures of a bunch of funny hipsters (because Zooey Deschanel is their queen) and eventually got to the closest area with two seats. ZD was adorable with all of her indie cred. M. Ward is always a little sketchy to me because he likes to wear sun glasses and my experience with those people is that they are high. Someone was smoking weed and there were little children around. I found it amusing. But the sound was much better up front and people were really into the music.

She & Him just makes me happy. There really is not another way to describe it.

Overall, it was a good day. Still, I do not really know how I feel about certain things. I have had the opportunity to finally think about things, and I am not sure that it has made things any better. I recognize some of my fears about life and relationships but it has not helped me understand in any way. I guess that is all I can ask for, for now.